Training Report: Resident Relationships
Bill Haley, Computer Lab Coordinator

The title of this quarter's inservice training was Facilitating Resident Relationships co-facilitated by Education & Research Interns Ashley Durkee and Corinn Johnson.

At the start of the workshop, a basket was passed and each attendee was asked to draw a fortune (or misfortune as it turned out) from the basket. At the appropriate time, we were instructed to open and read our new found situations. Some relatively minor, some more severe, but no one was spared a sudden disability. After reading our fortunes, each of us was asked to now consider how our life would be changed regarding what we could still do as opposed to what we would no longer be able to do. The exercise was designed to provide the opportunity to (at least mentally anyway) walk a mile in our resident's shoes so to speak. That's all well and good you may say, but what's that got to do with relationships? Well, as Programs & Residential Services Director Tricia Melvin has reminded me in the past," the residents are more like us than not." They, like us, have a strong desire to love and to be loved, to connect with another human being on a meaningful level, to not only be listened to, but to truly be heard.



Now, saddle those strong human desires with some of the disabilities we were asked to experience for a few minutes and you begin to get a little more insight and understanding into the challenges our residents face on a daily basis when it comes to relating with others.

So, how can we help? The Baddour Center is a community for adults and as such, we understand that not only do residents have a right to form healthy adult relationships, but that those relationships are an essential ingredient when it comes to enhancing a person's quality of life! One way is to support empowerment. One of the basic PCP values is that people have a right to make choices and be in control of their lives. That is no less true when it comes to relationships. We can encourage residents to make healthy choices and follow up on how to attain those choices. We can begin at what the resident's interests are and go from there. Residents place a high importance on friendship. They already appreciate the benefits of talking, doing things together, sharing a sense of history, reliable reciprocal support and just having fun together!

he Baddour Center provides an excellent environment for all of these things. On the other side of the coin, it presents some barriers by the sheer fact that it is for the most part, a communal living environment with an inherit lack of privacy. As staff members though, we can encourage residents to engage in preferred activities with one another at appropriate times and appropriate places. We can point residents with common interests to each other where they may find a new friend. Lastly, one of the best ways we can help facilitate healthy relationships is by our own example. Resident feedback indicates one of the most important things we as staff can do is to take the time to truly listen and to treat them like the mature adults they are.